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The Greatest Gaming Story Never ToldVote Now!

Gearoid Reidy, Wednesday 12-11-2008, 21:22:51

From our "What in Blazes?!" file: You've played Bioshock, Knights of the Old Republic, and Phoenix Wright, but you've never seen a gaming story like this. Over at Defunct Games, one man has taken it upon himself to tell the untold story of the Bionic Commando, Jack Markson.

Over 13 terrifying episodes, Cyril Lachel has read the 1991 Scholastic Publishing title "Bionic Commando" by J.B. Stamper, detailing Jack's (?!) battles with snipers, squid and killer plants as he battles the terrifying NAZZ organization and his voracious appetite (we repeat: ?!?!?!) with his sidekick Tiger.

Bionic Commando is part of the Cyril Reads series, where Cyril, for reasons best known to himself, presents to listeners "an absolutely abysmal video game novelization. But not any video game novelization ... we had to choose one of the worst". If you get all the way through Bionic Commando, why not go back and try his Ninja Gaiden?

What's even better (and we use the word hesitantly) is that this is not just a simple narration - real sound effects from the NES game are actually mixed in with the action.

Although this began a couple of months ago, the whole story is now wrapped up for your aural pleasure. Seriously, this must be checked out. There is no emoticon for what I'm feeling right now. 

Cyril Reads Bionic Commando


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